Gazing up at the few bright shining stars in the dark evening sky, I was feeling a bit hopeless about life. “How did you end up in this shit pile anyway?” I asked myself. Cold, my stomach empty and wallowing in self pity it was suddenly easy to imagine that from here I was only one small step away from total chaos. I saw the edge clearly before me. Just a little further from the hard, steel bench I would be sleeping on that night, because I couldn’t find a more comfortable place. Once over the edge there would be no easy way back. I just knew this. If I simply let myself fall into total despair and wasn’t able to summon the courage to change things for myself any more then I would surely end up on the other side. Where the insane, vagrants and other social outcasts might welcome me. It was a tempting option.
I fell asleep that night longing for better times and when I woke up I did turn my back on that edge, leaving it behind on the bench at the train station, but, it’s a moment I will never forget.